I Stand Watch

Its a funny place the maternity ward at a hospital. As a 'new' dad all the nurses keep telling me to get some rest, make sure I'm eating and taking care of myself as well. 'I'm good' I always reply.

All I hear in the middle of the night as I write this is the soft bustle of the nurse's station beyond the door. The cooing of babies as they dream, the soft breathing of my wife. The hum of the HVAC, thinking is it too hot in here? Now is it too cold? The ticking of the ancient, institutional clock in our room. How long until they need to eat again? When did they pop last? When did I pop last? 

'Get some sleep' they say. How am I expected to sleep when my mind is racing? All I can think about is the future. While I consider myself a pretty damn good dad I still have questions and fears running through my head. Fueled by lack of sleep and an abundance of caffine, my mind races along side my heart.

I stand watch. Here in the dark, in the least comfy chair of my life, in 3 day old clothes, bad breath, a neck beard that would make hipsters scoff. I wonder, how am I supposed to sleep. My beautiful wife sleeping, as her body recovers, beside me. My two amazing new treasures bundled up as little burritos of love in front of me. There is no time for sleep. It is my job to stand watch. To protect them. Now and always. 

I stand watch. To protect them from the cold, from hunger, from monsters, real and imaginary. Protect their bodies, their hearts and their minds. Protect their souls, their wonder and their dreams. It's my job to protect them. A job I take seriously. More seriously than any other responsibility I have ever accepted.  

So to all the nurses in all the materity wards, I say this to you. Thank you for your concern. Thank you for the work you do. Form you I've learned that it is not my sole responsiblity to keep them safe. It is shared. 

But regardless. 

I stand watch.

Singletons

As a soon to be parent of twins let me tell you something, Singletons are the worst. A singleton is a parent of one child. A single, lonely, spoiled child. Poor, poor child. We all know these Singleton assholes. They brag and boast about their sole child. Everything they can do, every thing that is impressive about them. But the worst thing about singletons? The WORST thing? When they complain about how hard it is. Really? You're having a rough day?

My wife and I's favorite game to play is to find and laugh at singletons. Our family swarms around them and we push them back and forth between us while our kids point and laugh at their single crying child. Then we all go for ice cream.

"Step up your parenting game Singleton! You weak bitch" is what we like to yell at them...from inside our car or under our breath.

All joking aside this all spawned from a Facebook group my wife is a part of. It's a group that is specifically for parents of twins. We have read through the posts and comments and find that parents of twins seem to think they are in some elite group. A group of mystical breeders that have been imbued with the power of Gemini and that makes them better than you Singleton. It's a very strange phenomenon that we have noticed.

You Singletons and Multipons can both step your game up!! Come at me when you have four!